Wow, it's been awhile since my last post. So much to say. It's been an eventful couple of months! I am now 37w4d and counting. It seems almost unreal that we are really to this point. I still am in some sort of strange denial that this is actually happening to us.

We are still preparing for the little one's impending arrival. The nursery is almost complete and we have a few things left to purchase, but we would be ok if everything happened today. Pregnancy has been not without challenges - 1st trimester screening issues and eventual clean bill of health, flu and dehydration, anemia, and swelling - but that's been it! Everything else has been fine (so far). The baby is currently weighing in at 8lbs 5 oz and I still have at least a week and a half to go. My OB won't start talking induction until at least 39 weeks.

J is doing ok - not great. I am hoping that the transition with the new baby will improve but am doubting it. I am assuming that there will be an extremely tough road ahead. I never thought that his joining our family would be so difficult. It is not getting better.............and I am not sure what to do. TM and I are fully consumed with J - how can that possibly continue with a new baby? Any suggestions are appreciated. We have counseling for J at the house 2x per week or approx 5 hours per week. We have taken him in for the psychological eval but have not gotten the report back yet. He is not excited about the baby - expressing his annoyance verbally on a regular basis. I think that we are doing everything that we can at this point and now it is up to him. He can either live by our rules or he will need to contemplate his different options. Keep in mind - the rules are not tough: respecting others, no arguing, homework, chores, and keeping his hands to himself. Now, in all fairness, I am not experienced in the land of 12 year olds, but damn - is everything deserving of an argument? I am really concerned.

The thing that bothers me most (when I am feeling particularly down) is that my excitement about this baby has been undercut. I try not to feel this way knowing that J has had a tough road so far, but some days it is tough.

I'll post more on the pregnancy in my next post.